I don't believe in angels, no. But I do have a wee parking angel. It's on my dashboard and you wind it up. The wings flap and it's supposed to give you a parking space. It's worked so far. Billy Connolly angeldashboardflap Change image and share on social
Heckling is an act of cowardice. If you want to speak, get up in front of the microphone and speak, don't sit in the dark hiding. It's easy to hide and shout and waste people's time. Billy Connolly actcowardicedark Change image and share on social
Never trust a man, who when left alone with a tea cosey... Doesn't try it on. Billy Connolly coseyleaveman Change image and share on social
There are two seasons in Scotland: June and Winter. Billy Connolly junescotlandseason Change image and share on social
I think my securities far outweigh my insecurities. I am not nearly as afraid of myself and my imagination as I used to be. Billy Connolly afraidimaginationinsecurity Change image and share on social
I don't know why I should have to learn Algebra... I'm never likely to go there. Billy Connolly algebralearn Change image and share on social
My definition of an intellectual is someone who can listen to the William Tell Overture without thinking of the Lone Ranger. Billy Connolly definitionintellectuallisten Change image and share on social
I don't believe in angels and I have trouble with the whole God thing. I don't want to say I don't believe in God, but I don't think I do. But I believe in people who do. Billy Connolly angelgodpeople Change image and share on social
Did your mother never tell you not to drink on an empty head? Billy Connolly drinkemptyhead Change image and share on social
I started to draw desert islands. They were just rough, shapes in the middle of the page. Then I began drawing shapes within those shapes and I was amazed how quickly the islands got better. It took off from there. Billy Connolly amazebegindesert share on social
