Stand-up is like a movie every night. You write it, direct it, produce it, the audience votes, and you go home. There's nothing more satisfying. Elayne Boosler audiencedirecthome Change image and share on social
I'd much rather see Richard Pryor or Jackie Mason in a theater than in a club. Elayne Boosler clubjackiemason Change image and share on social
It doesn't bother me that I'm not a household word on the East Coast. Baton Rouge, Raleigh, Minneapolis - I'm so popular in these cities where you've never imagined an East Coast comedian working. Elayne Boosler batonbothercity Change image and share on social
I pray if I ever find out I have only about three minutes to live it's during a basketball game, because then I'll have, what, 10, 12 years to live? Elayne Boosler basketballfindgame Change image and share on social
I have six locks on my door all in a row. When I go out, I lock every other one. I figure no matter how long somebody stands there picking the locks, they are always locking three. Elayne Boosler doorfigurelock Change image and share on social
I personally cannot tell you how many times we rescuers put our names on animals to come to us as soon as they are eligible for release, only to find they have been senselessly killed by overzealous pound workers. Elayne Boosler animaleligiblefind share on social
I love being down at Occupy Wall Street. The sincerity, the youth involvement, the desire for better, is palpable and moving. There is true caring, sharing, and refreshingly naive hope. Elayne Boosler caredesirehope Change image and share on social
I've never been married, but I tell people I'm divorced so they won't think something is wrong with me. Elayne Boosler divorcehavemarry Change image and share on social
Calgary wins for my coldest New Year's Eve gig. That's when I learned Fahrenheit and Celsius cross at 40 below. I could see callers' breath coming out of my phone. Elayne Boosler breathcalgarycaller Change image and share on social
To listen to your own silence is the key to comedy. Elayne Boosler comedykeylisten Change image and share on social
