For days after death hair and fingernails continue to grow, but phone calls taper off. Johnny Carson callcontinueday Change image and share on social
If variety is the spice of life, marriage is the big can of leftover Spam. Johnny Carson bigleftoverlife Change image and share on social
If life was fair, Elvis would be alive and all the impersonators would be dead. Johnny Carson alivedeadelvis Change image and share on social
Mail your packages early so the post office can lose them in time for Christmas. Johnny Carson christmasearlylose Change image and share on social
For three days after death, hair and fingernails continue to grow but phone calls taper off. Johnny Carson callcontinueday Change image and share on social
New York is an exciting town where something is happening all the time, most unsolved. Johnny Carson excithappentime Change image and share on social
We're more effective than birth control pills. Johnny Carson birthcontroleffective Change image and share on social
I know a man who gave up smoking, drinking, sex, and rich food. He was healthy right up to the day he killed himself. Johnny Carson daydrinkfood Change image and share on social
Never use a big word when a little filthy one will do. Johnny Carson bigfilthyword Change image and share on social
Married men live longer than single men. But married men are a lot more willing to die. Johnny Carson dielivelong Change image and share on social
