The wife's run off with the bloke next door. I do miss him. Download Download Share on Facebook Share on Twitter Rotate quotes bloke door mis
I went to the doctor last week. I said: 'Can I have some sleeping pills for the wife?' He said: 'Why?' I said: 'She's woke up.' Les Dawson doctorpillsleep Change image and share on social
I'm the most unromantic lump of Northern suet. Yes, a woman did accost me once in South Shields, but she had a face like Red Rum. Les Dawson accostfacelump Change image and share on social
My wife is a sex object - every time I ask for sex, she objects. Les Dawson objectsextime Change image and share on social
The closer I get to retirement, the more I feel it will be a huge change, a shock, because athletics has been the core of my whole life. I know I'll miss the feeling of running fast, the adrenaline rush, and hearing the crowd cheering me on. Jessica Ennis-Hill adrenalineathleticchange share on social
I like to get home, flop on the couch, and watch Sky Sports News. I'm just your average bloke. Alfie Allen averageblokecouch Change image and share on social
At one point, my house was a school for autistic children. I opened up my doors to about 30 kids and their families at the time. I was turning into Mary Poppins because I had to do something for these kids who have nowhere to go. So my house was the school for two years. Jenny McCarthy autisticchilddoor share on social
